What American Idol has brought to our relationship

“Is it me, or is the band drowning out Dolly Parton’s singing?”

“Yeah, I can’t hear her.”

“…”

“If only we could get a gospel band for you.”

“WHATEVER! I might not be the greatest singer, but Maly loves it when I sing to her.”

“I wasn’t talking about your singing.”

“…”

“…”

“Well, if only we could get you to sleep with a dryer sheet in your ass crack…”